Joe Tracini's Journey: Overcoming Inner Turmoil

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Overcoming inner turmoil, Joe Tracini shares his profound journey from battling self-doubt and depression to finding solace in magic, revealing how childhood bullying shaped his resilient yet vulnerable persona.

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Overcoming Inner Turmoil

Joe Tracini has long struggled with feelings of discomfort within himself.

Hailing from Great Yarmouth, he is the son of comedian Joe Pasquale, and from a young age, he battled self-doubt and episodes of depression.

Reflecting on his early years, he shares, "My first joke was performed on stage at just 18 months during one of my dad's shows." However, he admits that much of his confidence was merely a facade built to mask his insecurities.

Magic became his only outlet for connection with others, as he was often subjected to relentless bullying at school.

Describing himself, he says, "I seemed much older than I was, speaking like an adult, dressed in three-piece suits, and finding it hard to relate to other children." Now 37, he continues to grapple with these childhood challenges.

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At eleven, he altered his surname,

choosing Tracini over Pasquale,

following a close call for the Harry Potter part

that ultimately went to Daniel Radcliffe.

Six auditions led to that moment,

a significant setback,

yet he reflects that surviving the film series

might not have been his path.

A letter from the casting director remains in his possession,

a tangible memory of what almost was.

Seeking to forge his own identity,

he distanced himself from any legacy,

valuing his bond with his father

but desiring recognition for his own merits.

Musical theatre training opened doors

to acting and television presenting,

including a steady role on the popular soap Hollyoaks.

Behind the scenes, however,

he battled internal turmoil,

using substances and self-harm

to silence a critical inner voice named "Mick."

A diagnosis of borderline personality disorder a decade ago

brought immense relief,

clarifying years of struggle.

This understanding fueled his journey to sobriety,

marking ten years free from addiction

after multiple rehabilitation efforts.

He recognized his substance use as a symptom,

not a solution,

though medication left him feeling detached,

leading him to discontinue its use.

Lockdown times saw him embrace social media,

attracting a vast following

with humorous dance performances in a leotard.

Another video, detailing his BPD experiences—

mood shifts, impulsive actions, deep-seated fears,

and an enduring sense of void—

resonated widely, spreading across platforms.

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Overcoming Anxiety

He felt frozen, unable to move forward,

as months slipped away in a fog of panic.

A one-man show took shape in his mind,

a raw reflection titled from his own life,

yet the thought of stepping on stage

seemed an impossible mountain to climb.

Then, a search through a digital crowd

led to a doctor who could see the signs.

A diagnosis, a prescription given,

opening a door he thought was sealed shut.

The medication doesn’t mend all the fractures,

but it cleared the static, quieted the storm.

Where once he saw a forever sentence,

now he finds a path to write, to work, to breathe.

He says people often underestimate it,

but that understanding, that simple label,

became the thread that pulled him back—

a lifeline he never knew he needed.

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Joe Tracini's Solo Tour

Joe Tracini brought his acclaimed solo performance to life this summer at the Edinburgh Fringe. The show now embarks on a debut tour, launching at Norwich Theatre Playhouse—close to his childhood home.

For years, Tracini was consumed by this production, feeling a personal duty to finally stage it.

“Completing it was a necessary act of self-care,” he explains, “whether it succeeded or not. It allowed me to find peace and move forward.”

The performance delves into long-held struggles that once overwhelmed him. “That chapter is closed; it no longer defines who I am,” Tracini reflects.

He acknowledges that the internal voice he calls Mick remains, but their relationship has changed.

“It’s like adjusting to a difficult roommate. I’d prefer he leaves someday, but for now, we coexist.”

Where he once dwelled on past regrets, Tracini now focuses ahead.

“Planning for the future—weeks and months out—is something even Mick can’t dispute.”

For those touched by topics in this story, support resources are available via the BBC Action Line.

Stay connected with Norfolk news on BBC Sounds, Facebook, Instagram, and X.

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